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DOOR 2: WOMEN ONLY
This just in:
La, ME: Hello, these "call" columns are increasingly pathetic and, more importantly, extremely unfunny. I used to deal with them periodically like my wife's menstrual period. I know my feelings will alienate your important 14-year old crowd.
Why don't you have a poll about how tired we are of these "call" columns?
----
Okay! What the hell!
The writer is referring to the columns I do, such as
Sunday's
, in which I phone customer service agents and interrogate them about their products. I've been doing them roughly every four months, for many years.
What do think of them?
I don't like them, at least not anymore. You should stop.
I like them, but you do them a little too often.
I like them. You should continue at the current pace.
And while we're at it, what do you think of the
male-female columns
I used to do every few months with Gina Barreca?
(I do them less frequently now.)
I don't like them. You should stop altogether.
They are fine, but only rarely.
I like them. You should start doing them more often, again.
Okay, how about columns in which I answer
"What If?" hypotheticals
posed by my editor. I do these about twice a year.
I don't like them. You should stop.
I like them.
I like them a lot. You should do them more often.
What sorts of columns do you think I should write more often? Choose the best answer.
Columns where you go places and do stuff.
Columns reacting to world/national events or politics.
Completely off the wall columns, bordering on silliness and/or vulgarity.
I think you currently have a pretty good mix of columns.
I think you should stop writing columns; you're not very good.
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