{"id":69057,"date":"2019-03-28T15:24:21","date_gmt":"2019-03-28T22:24:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.questionpro.com\/blog\/?p=69057"},"modified":"2019-03-28T15:24:21","modified_gmt":"2019-03-28T22:24:21","slug":"what-men-want-african-american-men-on-love-dating-and-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.questionpro.com\/blog\/what-men-want-african-american-men-on-love-dating-and-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"What Men Want: African-American Men on Love, Dating and Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In a recent article based on an EBONY\/QuestionPro study, we took a deep dive into Black women\u2019s current attitudes on love, dating, marriage and other issues. The data was surprising and complex.<\/p>\n<p>But what about the guys? Could we expect the tropes of simplicity and predictability with regard to African-American males and the same subjects? Again, the results were surprising and complex. Welcome to 2019.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The study was a joint EBONY\/QuestionPro research initiative conducted in February with approximately 700 respondents. Nearly 300 African-American males, whose numbers were spread evenly across educational and financial demographics participated in the survey. Fifty-four percent of respondents have never been married, 31 percent are currently married, and the remainder are either divorced, widowed or separated.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Here is the current relationship status of unmarried Black men respondents:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not looking right now: 27 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Looking but not dating: 23 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In a committed relationship but living apart: \u00a020 percent <\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Living with someone:18 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dating but not exclusively: 11 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><a class=\"square-cta secondary-lined-cta\" href=\"https:\/\/www.questionpro.com\/a\/showEntry.do?mode=audience&amp;sourceRef=blog-audience\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><strong>Select your respondents<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>Let\u2019s get what men REALLY want out of the way<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are Black men \u201calways up for it\u201d as the perennial trope seems to suggest? \u00a0Data from the study indicates Black men are multidimensional and thoughtful as it relates to when it\u2019s appropriate first to have sex when dating.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here is the breakdown (and we\u2019ve added female responses for a comparison):<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0No hard, fast rule: 42 percent (47 percent for women)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Two or three dates: 21 percent (3 percent for women)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Once it\u2019s known relationship will be exclusive: 14 percent (31 percent for women)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0First date: 9 percent (fewer than 1 percent for women)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Not until marriage: 8 percent (16 percent for women)<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Black women are more conservative than Black men, indeed, but men are far from cavalier when it comes to first having sex in dating relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>But can the brothers commit?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">More than half of Black men (52 percent) surveyed want to marry their current partners, 38 percent indicate not being sure, and only 11 percent say they have no interest. This tells us African-American males aren\u2019t nonchalant or wasting time in their dating explorations. (Fifty percent have no problem dating without a serious commitment; surprisingly, this figure is lower than the one for Black women, which is 60 percent).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Further evidencing that Black men are not averse to commitment, 47 percent state they have been with their current partners for five years or more, and only 11 percent say they haven\u2019t made it past the six-month honeymoon. What\u2019s more, 61 percent of respondents claim their sex lives with their current partners is without issues, while 65 percent say cheating is absent in their relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Where do Black men go to find partners?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Parallel to our research on women, physical networking still tops when it comes to meeting potential mates. Twenty-two percent of Black men see friends as the primary way, and online dating comes in second at 17 percent.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">After friends and the internet, here is where Black men find someone to date:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Social club: 12 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Work: 12 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Bars: 11 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Family introduction: 8 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0School: 5 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here is the breakdown on where they actually met their current partners or spouses:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Through friends: 23 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Online dating service: 20 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0At work: 15 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0At school: 12 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Family introduction: 5 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Church, mosque or other places of worship: 5 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Social club: 5 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0At a bar: 4 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The study also found single Black men are hopeful as far as finding companions: 86 percent say they are optimistic about being in a relationship; 56 percent are confident they will one day marry. Only 11 percent of participants state they are not optimistic about finding a companion, but 15 percent believe they will never be married. \u00a0By comparison, 26 percent of Black female respondents are not optimistic about landing Mr. Right.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So do African-American males even want to get married? Apparently, they do: \u00a050 percent agree\/strongly agree that marriage is important, whereas only 16 percent disagree\/strongly disagree that marriage is important.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Interracial dating<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Getting back to tropes, there is a famous (or infamous) one that Black men secretly want to cross the racial divide regarding matrimony possibilities. In our last article, we mentioned Spike Lee\u2019s Jungle Fever as a representation of the interracial dating challenges for both men and women. When it comes to Black men, though, the results are closer to the 2002 film Undercover Brother, wherein the protagonist, played by Eddie Griffin, becomes a hero to his colleagues (including the paranoid David Chappelle character) for being in a relationship with a White woman.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to being open to marrying a Caucasian, 50 percent agree\/strongly agree,18 percent disagree\/strongly disagree, and 29 percent are neutral. As for marrying Asians, 46 percent agree\/strongly agree; only 8 percent disagree\/strongly disagree; and one-third, 33 percent, are neutral. Fifty percent of Black men agree\/strongly agree with marrying a Hispanic, 18 percent disagree\/strongly disagree and 31 percent are neutral.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The crossing-the-racial-divide trope is dope, it seems, and Black men better keep this under their hats or many may end up sleeping on the couch or isolated with the boys at a bar. The numbers shift in the men\u2019s responses about attraction to lighter-skinned individuals; only 26 percent of respondents state they agree\/strongly agree, 36 percent disagree\/strongly disagree and 34 percent are neutral.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><a class=\"square-cta secondary-lined-cta\" href=\"https:\/\/www.questionpro.com\/a\/showEntry.do?mode=audience&#038;sourceRef=blog-audience\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><strong>Select your respondents<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>About LGBTQ relationships<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How do men feel about LGBTQ issues? Ninety percent of study respondents state they are straight, and 16 percent of those claim they have ever been attracted to another man. Eleven percent say they have experienced a sexual encounter with another man, and 15 percent agree\/strongly agree that a man can have a homosexual encounter and not be classified as gay; 65 percent disagree\/strongly disagree that a man can remain straight after one homosexual encounter.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sixteen percent state they discovered during a relationship their partner was a lesbian, transgender or bisexual.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to same-sex marriage, here is what African-American males say about it being legal:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0No: 34 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Yes: 31 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Don\u2019t care: 20 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Not sure\/Other: 15 percent<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Do Black men believe a gay person can become straight? Forty-three percent agree\/strongly agree this is the case, 30 percent disagree\/strongly disagree. When it comes to trans people having a choice, 51 percent agree\/strongly agree, and 25 percent disagree\/strongly disagree.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It should be noted that, as with the study on Black women, the lower the income, the more conservative the attitude of African-American men. Millennials generally are far more liberal in their views of LGBTQ relationships. Overall, however, 51 percent of Black men say if celebs were to come out as gay or bisexual, their opinions of those stars would remain unchanged.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What does this data tell us? It seems there is hope in all these tropes, even as times and Black men\u2019s societal views evolve. Perhaps in time, Black love will come to fully embody the love described in scripture.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>What is EBONY Attitudes?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Periodically, EBONY hosts online surveys to measure attitudes about contemporary topics affecting African-Americans. After you sign up, we will send you invitations to participate in our surveys as well as survey results. Each survey will take fewer than 10 minutes to complete. Sign up now.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.questionpro.com\/what-women-want:-love-marriage-and-dating.html\">Download the full infographic report here<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In a recent article based on an EBONY\/QuestionPro study, we took a deep dive into Black women\u2019s current attitudes on [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":102,"featured_media":69059,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[206,203],"tags":[1053,1055,321],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>What Men Want: African-American Men on Love, Dating and Marriage | QuestionPro<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Take a deep dive into Black men\u2019s current attitudes on love, dating, marriage and other issues. 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